The “full time mummy” debate

Just after I’d moved into my flat I was out in town with Max when I got stopped by a woman doing some kind of survey. We were chatting for a few minutes and she was taking my details when she asked “and what do you do? Are you a full time mum?” I didn’t know what to say because I cannot STAND that expression, but I didn’t have a job at that point. So technically I couldn’t really say anything.

First of all: I am by no means saying there’s anything wrong with being a stay at home mum. I stayed at home with Max from when he was 8 months old until he started nursery last September and I loved it. I personally prefer working part time as it gives me the best of both worlds, but everyone has a different opinion.

What bugs the CRAP out of me is when people describe staying at home as being a “full time mummy.” Let’s get this straight. It is NOT a job. It is NOT something that belongs in your “occupation” on Facebook. And it is certainly NOT the “hardest job in the world” and to say it is is quite frankly an insult to people such as life saving surgeons, people in the military, etc etc.

Being a stay at home mum was tiring and did drive me mad sometimes. But let’s not be silly here – when you’re at home you don’t have to work to a schedule. To a certain extent you can do things at your own pace. You can go and make a cuppa whenever you want, you don’t have to get dressed if you don’t bloody want to. And you do have fun.

When you choose to have a child, you are making a decision and a life commitment. If you think it’s a job and that you deserve endless praise for doing what women have been doing since the dawn of time then you shouldn’t be doing it. Whether you work 50 hours a week or you stay at home your children’s whole lives, we’re ALL “full time mums.” And it’s about time we got rid of this ridiculous expression.


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