Don’t hold back

I think this is the longest I’ve gone between posts since I started this blog! Real life has been so crazy lately, plus both Max and I have been really ill the past week. I took him to a fete over the weekend but I wish I could have enjoyed it more, I had a migraine all day and a terrible throat. He did have his first ride on a pony though which was cute. 😊

Max is at his dad’s tonight and I’m sat at home with a green tea. Usually when I have a free evening I always have something planned, because I don’t get much spare time, but tonight I felt like I needed some time by myself just to relax. I always feel like I’m rushing somewhere, I never get enough sleep and I’ve been quite run down so I’m just gonna get in my PJs and watch a film.

So this morning I woke up in a really good mood. I have the Timehop app on my phone where I can see my old Facebook and twitter updates, and I like to look at them to see how far I’ve come since then. Even just a year ago when I was just starting out in my new place seems like a lifetime ago. I was thinking to myself, what’s changed so that I’m living so differently from how I was 6 years ago? And the answer is me. I’m what’s changed.

People who didn’t know me at school will probably be surprised to hear that I used to be shy as a child. I mean PAINFULLY shy, to the extent that I would go bright red if someone I didn’t know spoke to me. I don’t remember the exact moment I eventually came out of my shell, but it was one of the best things I ever did.

Life can be very difficult if you’re shy. For example, when I joined my gym with the intention of weight training I had no idea what I was doing. My 13 year old self would have sat down, looked around, attempted to use the equipment, probably injured myself and left after 5 minutes just out of fear of asking for help.

What I actually did was ask someone to show me everything I wanted to use and exactly how to do it. Once you know, you know and then you’re sorted.

The point I wanted to make was that fear is stupid. It will hold you back from what you really want to do. I understand what it’s like to be shy and the only way to get over it is to interact. You CAN have whatever you want, but sometimes you have to ask for it. πŸ˜‰


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